Wish Bub's luck--he's getting snipped on Monday!
It's hard to believe we are on day 12 of having our new baby in the house. I want to be so appreciative of all that we have and I think one of the areas in which I have been particularly lucky is that I've never gotten post partum depression. My heart goes out to the women it affects because while I love little Ashley more than I can imagine, this is hard work and I can't imagine doing it when depressed--the feeling of which I am very familiar. As for the family and how they are adapting, my two older kids have been absolutely amazing. Our new family ritual has been me feeding Ashley in my stuffed rocking chair and one or both of the older kids standing behind us while brushing my hair. Oxytocin is called the love hormone for a reason--but when you get it from all three of your kids at the same time--no wonder we are wired as a species to have babies.
However, since I now have had the joy of delivering 3 babies, we are done. It's Bubs turn to lay on a uncomfortable bed and he's going to get a vasectomy on Monday. We started meeting with the urologist right after I was having the hematomas because while there was a faint whisper in my brain of wanting more kids prior to that, being on bedrest for close to a month sealed it that we are done having kids. I think there's a standard spiel that they have to give that we should wait six months and make double and triple sure. But we have three kids, we aren't new to this and while Ashley's pregnancy was relatively easy, I can't do another month (or longer) of bedrest should I get pregnant again. The urologist wanted us to check in with him after the delivery to ensure we were sure about cutting some balls and, if we were, he would schedule something. Monday it is.
Bub's parents are going to be packing up the RV and moving on in the second week of May so we really wanted to get his vasectomy done while they are here because Bub's will be laid up for a couple of days and can't do any lifting. I guess his poor balls can swell up to the size of softballs if he doesn't rest--but I have to be honest, I'm kind of curious to see that and seeing has how huge I got with Ashley, it does seem kind of fair. He recoils at the thought of swollen balls but he's always been such a baby.
I know he doesn't want to do this and I get it and I would consider getting my tubes tied but after looking at it, the vasectomy is a much less invasive surgery. I can't wait because to me it feels like we can finally get busy without having to worry about pregnancy. I was on the pill from 17 to 23 and while it's nice to be worry free, it also kind of messed with me and I think made me more hormonals and more depressed. After TJ was born we were mostly careful and I'd track things on a calendar and then an app--and while that method worked for many years, the cute little red head who just moved in proves it's far from foolproof. So I'm trying to give him a pep talk about how fun it will be when the after 16 years of a very active sex life--not worrying about having any more kids will be really fun.
I love you so much Bubs and thank you so much for being willing to do this for me...I promise I'll make it worth your while when we are able to do it again. You thought I was a little freak before? Wait until there is no concern about me getting pregnant...
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteGood luck Bubs. I feel for you
ReplyDeleteTake care of him. I can't help feeling bad about it.
ReplyDeleteTell Bub's it's not bad at all. I had it done 35 years ago and no regrets. A couple of pieces of advice for Bubs though. 1. Take the doctor seriously, rest and use ice (or a bag of frozen peas). Take it easy for about a week. 2. Once you are ready to be sexually active again USE PROTECTION until the doc tells you are are for sure shooting blanks. 35 years ago that required 2 check-ins where you provide samples to be examined. One at 6 weeks and another 2 weeks later. That means you will have at least a couple of weeks after Dani is ready to go again that you need to be careful. You don't want any surprises.
ReplyDeleteBubs, I promise you that you will not feel any difference. Sex is just as great (maybe better because wifey is more relaxed) as before.
Now, this brings up a great practical joke (I know you like practical jokes) I played on a friend. We will call him Bill. We were in a supper club with about 7 other couples. Bill and his wife had recently had a second child plus 1 miscarriage and they decided they were done, so Bill got snipped. Now Bill was one of those guys that would give you TMI about their sex life. It just worked out that the day he had his first check-in after being snipped we had supper club that evening (Friday). Bill came in talking about how great it was going to not having to use protection anymore. He and wifey were going to the beach without the kids and it was going to be all sex all day. All of us that had been through the procedure were warning him that he had to be rechecked in a couple of weeks to be completely safe. Bill just blew that off. "That's just those doctors covering their ass, I'm not doing that again it was humiliating." This conversation went on all night, it in fact got more graphic the more beer we drank. Well, Bill and wifey went off to the beach the next morning. On Monday morning I had my secretary call their home phone and leave a code-a-phone message (long before cell phones, caller id or voicemail) saying it was the doctors office and they had mistakenly gotten his sample mixed up with someone else's and his was still positive and they needed to continue to use protection and come back in for recheck in 2 weeks. The following Saturday night after Bill and wifey got home I got a phone call. Bill, "who did it? who left that message? I know it's a joke but wifey is freaking out. This is her prime time of the month." I denied everything and to this day I have never told him.
so you have to read the post I'm about to make--I would have loved to have to have done something similar-but my dear husband is a dead man and will not be alive long enough for me to prank him!
Delete