After almost 20 years of being together, my husband can still surprise me

 As I sit in our bed, laptop perched on my belly (which seems huge all of the sudden) and weepy from the events of the day and crazy hormones, I am reminded how lucky I am. It's about 1:30 in the morning and I can't sleep. Not a wink. My kids are tucked safely in their rooms, my husband is sleeping soundly while taking huge, rhythmic breaths and the little one inside of me seems happy and content. Our outdoor only cats seem calm and two of the dogs are snoring at the base of the stairs. Aside from our third dog who does hourly patrols around the house to make sure all is safe, everyone in my house is sleeping soundly in the cool fall evening. So much of that peace is because I got so lucky with who I married--who also happens to be one of the reasons I can't sleep, I'm just so excited to be in his presence.  

I hadn't really thought of this until recently but my due date is April 18th. That will be very close to exactly 20 years when Bubs and I were sat next to each other in 7th grade enriched math so he could help me. I'm very into dates and anniversaries and finding meaning because people were born in a certain season or month so it really surprises me that I've never made this connection before. With a very brief interruption, he and I will have been together exactly 20 years when our third (and most certainly last) child is born. 20 years. 

I keep repeating 20 years because one thing about Bubs is there are never surprises with him. He's romantic in his own way but he has never been the type to surprise me with flowers at work or a last minute trip to Hawaii for our anniversary. Every girl likes romantic surprises but I can also accept that the same part of his personality that has made him a successful engineer and pilot also makes it so things are always planned in an A to B to C manner. Trust me, I love him the way he is and wouldn't trade all the flowers and vacations in the world if it meant he was less of a rock I can lean on than he is. 

He's been out of town for close to two weeks now and was not supposed to be back until next Tuesday. I guess my rambling preamble spoiled the surprise--if he's sleeping next to me now, obviously he came home early. But how it came to happen warms my little heart because it shows he loves me and listens to me and wants the best for me. I was OK last week with him gone, I had plenty to do, kids were busy and as I mentioned on Sunday, I was even happy to have some alone time. But this week hormones really hit me and I was nearly inconsolably missing him. It got so bad on Wednesday night that I had to call my older sister to come over and sleep in my house with my kids so I could go to my parents so my sobbing wouldn't wake the kids up and scare them. We've been separated before. With his regular job he's been gone anywhere from 50 to 100 days a year. We've done two military deployments where he's been gone for 5 and 6 months. I've missed him on every trip he's taken but this was a real, palpable feeling of longing that I could not squelch. I know a lot of it has to do with pregnancy hormones, but a lot of it has to do with finally being in such a good spot with each other. We've always loved each other but in these past few months I literally NEED to be around him. 

On Thursday evening I finally broke down and told him how sad I was that he was gone and I really wanted him home earlier than Tuesday. He said that he was so sorry but he was meeting his new team in Arizona and they had meetings scheduled on Monday but he said that he missed me too and couldn't wait to see me as well. That made me feel a little better but counting down five days until he would be home felt like a prison sentence. 

This morning my sister called me very early and asked what time I would be home from work. I told her usually about 1. She said that she really needed my help "exactly at 1" to go to the grocery store with her to help get stuff for Thanksgiving. Her stern voice with the exact time made me laugh a little bit and I asked her what was up and she snapped at me and said "I'm really stressed Danielle, just be ready right at 1." I was like ok sis, 1 o'clock it is. Then my younger sister called shortly after and she said that she needed my help--also "exactly at 1 o'clock" to go to Home Depot with her. I was like "ok, Jenn wants me to go to the grocery store at 1 and now you're saying you need my help exactly at 1, what's going on?" My little sister said she "needed to make a call and hung up." About 1 minute later my older sister called back and said it's all worked out but now I would be taking our mom to the grocery store--again exactly at 1 o'clock.  I told her that whatever they were doing was really annoying but I was happy to help. 

So I got home from school, my mom was waiting for me and she asked me if I knew what the other two were up to.  I asked if she had also been pestered to be ready at a precise time and she said yes. She then even said that she didn't even really need to go to the store and was really confused. I told her we might as well play along because Jenn had given me a very precise list of everything that she needed. So if nothing else from all the cloak and dagger, I got to have a very nice afternoon with my mom. 

When we drive into our neighborhood, we have to drive by Jenn's house. As we drove past, Bubs was standing next to both Jenn and Jess with a huge bouquet of flowers. I gave a casual wave as if it were a normal Friday afternoon and he was just chatting in the neighbors yard. It took me about five seconds to register that he was actually standing there and when I did, I slammed on the breaks so heard that my my mom actually swore at me for maybe the fourth time in my life: "Danielle, what the fuck is wrong with you!"  I was like "Bubs is there!" she said of course he was but that was no reason to give her whiplash. I ignored her and parked next to the curb and ran up to him with tears in my eyes and about squeezed the life out of the poor man. I was so excited to see him. I think he thought I was going to tackle him as I was running up to him so he had to hand the flowers to my sister, lest they be smashed but even she had tears in her eyes because she was happy that their little "mission" had worked. 

When Bubs heard how sad I was on Thursday, he worked it out with his new boss to come home early (again I love this new boss, his old boss wouldn't have even had the conversation) and they could postpone the team activity until he gets onsite in January. Bubs was able to rearrange his flight but knew that I wouldn't be able to pick him up because of work. So he had my sisters concoct a story to have me out of the neighborhood so they could drive in and pick him up and surprise me when I got home. It didn't work out perfectly because my mom and I got back about 30 minutes before they'd planned and I was supposed to walk in the house to find Bubs making me dinner. I loved the gesture and he did get to make me dinner--but to be honest I liked having the extra 30 minutes with him more and I always love smooching and hugging on him in public because PDA makes him so adorably uncomfortable. 

We were able to pick up the kids together from school and had an amazing evening eating a family dinner then watching Muppets Christmas Carol (where my son laughs his head off every year because he is 100% convinced Beaker gives Scrooge "the bird"). We got them ready for bed, read them their books and Bible verses and they were fast asleep. We then got some very sweet mom and dad cuddle time--cuddle time that happened five days earlier than it was supposed to--because I'm married to an amazing man.